It’s a glorious day in Oklahoma.
I’m not talking about the weather, though it’s been nice. I’m not talking about presidential hopeful Ben Carson’s visit, either, though I hope his visit (and Ted Cruz’s visit before him) brings a few more candidates to Tulsa — Bobby Jindal at Dong’s Guns? Bernie Sanders at All Souls?
Anyway, no. Those things are all great, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the news I got this morning that my two passions in life have been combined.
Yes, I’m talking about QuikTrip and my phone.
QuikTrip launched an app today. “Big deal,” you say. “Yes,” I reply. “Big deal.”
It locates the nearest QuikTrip for you (though if you don’t have all of their locations memorized, face it, you’re a bad Tulsan.) It tells you the gas prices at each individual store.
IT GIVES YOU COUPONS FOR FOOD.
I REPEAT, IT GIVES YOU COUPONS FOR FOOD.
This is a gamechanger, folks. And it spells trouble for me. Do I spend too much time on my phone as it is? I would argue that I spend just the right amount of time on my phone (my wife would disagree.)
Do I eat too much QuikTrip food as it is? I would argue that I don’t eat enough (my dad bod might also disagree.)
But I don’t care, this is all going to be worth it.
Maybe if they get one million app downloads, they’ll bring back The Squart? (How did an item named “The Squart” ever get popular? The 80s were a weird time.)
And if we can’t get “The Squart” back, can we at least get back those awesome blueberry pancake sausage wrap things? I felt like a kid watching his parents get divorced when they took those away. “Is it because I was bad? Did I do something wrong?”
Let us all welcome our new QuikTrip overlords.